NU #2: On Being Assertive by T. N. Gaudi

NU #2

12 January  2013

MBAH 10-B / Entrepreneurship

On Being Assertive

(New Attitude/Paradigm)

By T. N. Gaudi

I think this as a general phenomena, that people most of the time are fearful of illusions of impoliteness even though trying to be polite would, in some cases, inflict pain and suffering. Please allow me to illustrate.

We can observe this in cases of some employees tolerating bad employers because of debt of gratitude or 'utang na loob', in saying 'yes' to someone's (or especially a group's) invitation or request even when it means painfully rearranging schedules, or in accepting any proposition just for the sake of accommodating it out of politeness even though we know that it will have negative and painful implications on us or on what we do. I believe that societal and cultural norms play a very big role in this kind of attitude and behavior but it is sometimes detrimental in that it violates our individuality. It limits us very much and creates a stigma that puts a cap on our perceived potential. This then traps us in a downward spiral brought about by low self-esteem and hopelessness. This type of behavior comes with a lot costs, tangible and intangible, emotional or otherwise. Given these, there is a need for change, and it would largely require changing our mindsets.    

I personally believe that in order for us to correct this behavior, the key is that we should be open to being more assertive.  To be assertive in this context should mean not to be simply aggressive but rather to be self-assured, and confident, and basically to be fair with oneself by recognizing one's rights. We should try and change this kind of attitude and truly know what we deserve as an individual. We should understand that we have the choice to live a full life by living up to our full potential. By simply changing our mindset, we expose ourselves to more opportunities and thereby increasing our potential and our chances for success. We will be in an advantageous position wherein we will be able to have access to more options and to the much needed confidence to progress rightly so as individuals. Let's make this a habit by practicing this in our everyday lives. Let's appreciate ourselves and be assertive. Below are what we can apply and integrate in our daily lives that may help us reap the benefits of being assertive.

7 Tips and things to remember:

1. Know that you deserve much as an individual

2. Value your personal time

3. Know that it is only ourselves that we can ultimately rely on

4. Understand that we are limited only by what we think

5. Speak your mind always

6. Encourage other people to do the same and be more assertive

7. Help remind yourself by putting sticky notes on your mirror, desktops, or wherever you can see them regularly  3.5